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What’s funny?

I don’t know what’s funny anymore. The fun has gone out of irony. “No Child Left Behind” was funny. “Mission Accomplished” w/codpiece was funny. But World War III has not been funny since the seventies. Global Warming isn’t funny anymore, especially now that it’s replacing tanning salons as the “natural” way to stay brown year-round. I have to admit that the Supreme Court is still pretty funny. I love the costumes.

I guess its not funny because I’m too uptight about everything. I really need to lighten up. I mean, there are eight or so other planets, and Saturn looks totally cool. It’s so huge that I could probably afford a two-bedroom apartment there. That makes me feel better. I was getting stuck in thoughts of lack and limitation. After all, there must be a reason that God gave us several planets and spaceships.

By God, I am of course referring to the One Divine Source of All Material Blessings For Which I Am Grateful, not to be confused with any gods of retribution, privation or any of that other negativity. Pity the poor souls who believe in them. And I do mean poor.

Poverty. Now there’s a humorous subject. I only say that because it’s really just an illusion. There really is an abundance of everything on the planet and it’s only their own limited thinking that keeps them in their miserable situation. If they would only spend their energy envisioning a garden in the desert then Haliburton might get a contract to build a nuclear plant which would free up the water from the hydroelectric plant that Pepsico could sell to them, which they could buy with the money they make selling poppy, which supports an international drug enforcement (sic) industry, which creates a free flow of money that is unfettered by the corrupting control of government and allows capitalism in its purest form to flower. The poor people are really holding us back with their, well, poverty consciousness.

I think that the best way for me to make a difference would be to distribute photos of Hummers to the poor areas of the world so they could hang them on their walls as a way of focusing their desire and training their consciousness to transform desire into manifestation. I’d have them laminated in case they hang them on a wet part of the thatch.

A Hummer would make an excellent home for many of the world’s poor. It’s got heat and air-conditioning and XM Radio built right in. And it would be sensitive to the cultural heritage of the nomadic peoples.

I feel better now, but a little drained. I’d better do a little shopping, just to sustain the example of prosperity consciousness and also to keep the money in circulation. Helping poor people is not easy, and I have to remember to nurture myself. Otherwise, how can I be effective in serving others?

One Comment

  1. Joanna Rush Wilpan Joanna Rush Wilpan October 19, 2007

    Bravo!!! Hysterical. This is your gift. So happy to receive it!!!!!

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